In my late twenties, I have really figured out that one of the main ways I express love is through gifts. Pretty much every time I go to the grocery store (or any store), I come home with a few “surprises,” as I call them, for Daniel. Things from the Target dollar section, a new hot sauce to try, several kinds of gelato… no matter what it is, I can’t wait to bestow these little gifts on him when I get home.
I love sending copies of Madeline to friends who have shared they are having a little girl, sending flowers to my mom, sister, or a friend for any myriad of reasons, or anything that can be ordered online and delivered directly to the recipient to share some happiness.
Giving gifts brings me joy. And I like to think I have gotten pretty darn good at it. And with a little planning and thoughtfulness, you can give great gifts too! Here is my strategy for great gift-giving…
Like most of my advice, this one starts with a more practical piece of the gift-giving puzzle: budget. I try to set a budget and stick to it. For family, I typically apply the same amount to all of our siblings and our siblings’ kids. For parents, I keep another budget, etc. This helps keep things equitable and also helps me plan in our household budget. I keep a Trello “directory” of birthdays and anniversaries so I know what months are going to be the most expensive and so I never miss a birthday!
Try to write down ideas when you have them. You know when you are out shopping and you see something that is perfect for your mom? Or your best friend? I drop a note on Trello with the person’s name, the item(s), and where I found them as I find them — that is, if I don’t just go ahead and buy it right then (but sometimes that’s not in the budget).
If you don’t have an idea tucked away, start by brainstorming things you know they like. When my husband and I started dating, I quickly discovered that while he gives me great gifts, that’s about where his gift-giving skills ended. He grew up in the kind of household where you gave your parents a list and they usually purchased a few items on it for you, without a lot of guesswork. So trying to think of thoughtful gifts for his three sisters who I barely knew at that point was a challenge. I started thinking through what I knew they liked - Harry Potter, the St. Louis Blues, nail polish, Nightmare Before Christmas, Disney in general, you get the idea. Thanks to a trip to see my family in Florida in early December, we came home armed with great gifts from Universal and Disney for them. You don’t have to know everything about someone! Just take what you know and run with it. Do they like to bake? Are they coffee drinkers or tea drinkers? What’s their alcoholic beverage of choice? Do they love to travel? Answers to these really basic questions can help you find the perfect gift for them. Keep those easy questions in mind when you spend time with people and be observant and you will be halfway there already when their special day rolls around.
Consider a signature gift or two. As I mentioned above, I love giving friends who have announced they are having a little girl (which honestly, has been pretty much all my soon-to-be parent friends; where are the boys?) copies of Madeline. But for all my bi-lingual-couple friends, I also give them copies of the second language version as well. This is definitely one of my signature gifts.
A word about cards: Please, please write a message in cards, don’t just sign your name! A thoughtful gift should have a thoughtful note. I use a simple formula most of the time that makes is super simple to personalize that card:
I saw this and thought of you! I hope that you have a birthday that is just as such and such (wonderful and fun, etc.) as you! Happy Birthday! Love, Aly.
It’s short and sweet, but so much better than just a name, n’est-ce pas?
Keep these simple five tips in mind and you are well on your way to giving your friends and family the perfect gift on their next birthday!